Please see my latest post.
I find the emphasis on addiction not as useful for positive behavioral change. Many people who would be Dx with sexual addiction never learned or were modeled good relationship skills including emotional and erotic intelligence.
As long as it is an addiction then it could be accepted as noy being under ones’ control and billed to insurance as a Pathology.
Addictions are big business but truth be told 12 steps are not very effective.
Poor Tiger. When we finally emerge from the Victorian mores of our ancestors and realize that our sexual suffering is the result of ignorance, things may begin to change. Much of sex addiction is due to the inability to achieve a complete and satisfying orgasm. This invariably leaves a person wanting more, thus creating the “addiction.” The flip-side would be the prehensile insanity in which power and/or money attracts sexual interest like moths to a flame… How is an “addict” to rise above this? How does one begin to achieve satisfying orgasms? Over seventy years ago, therapists such as Wilhelm Reich illuminated the path, should anyone wish to explore. No idea whether Pine Grove/Gentle Path does, but total abstinence suggests not. Will power is not the way to a satisfying orgasm.
It is practically impossible to have a public discussion about sexual compulsivity without stumbling over well intentioned but misguided opinions, bascially because everyone has some personal investment in their position. I applaud this author for trying to dispell some of the myths. Let me add a few points of clarification: First, sexual compulsivity generally has no relationship whatsoever to an inability to acheive sexual satisfaction – inability to obtain orgasim is generally irrellevent although this “nymphomania” myth continues to propogate decade after decade. Second, repressive sexual morality is not a significant cause either. To the contrary. We have been a sensation-seeking, thrill-seeking society for decades now, and that has its costs in turns of our ability to develop and maintain intimacy. Third, sexual addiction recovery treatment is not synonymous with 12-step work, although the 12-steps are often a helpful adjunct, so the debate is pretty irellevent over whether or not the 12-steps “work” (itself a dubious question when discussing self-help systems as opposed to treatments: it’s a bit like proving that the existence of gyms does not cause weight loss.) And while saying that the addiction label puts something “not under one’s control” is commonly made conservative rhetoric, it is particularly wierd to see it on a web page just centimeters below the author’s description of an accountability group so excoriating its members nicknamed it “crime and punishment.”
© 2009 Benoit Denizet-Lewis
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